If I had a magic wand I'd grant each and every one of you badass bloggers that wish.
Instead I have a magic stylus and I created this...
Pretty sweet right?
Don't look at how long this skirt is on me...my legs look like they are 2 inches tall. I was "trying" to do the whole "midi" thing and well... basically #epicfail. Okay, now I don't feel so bad when Sea of Shoes also looks like her legs are 2 inches tall.
I made this t-shirt for myself but have uploaded the graphic to my Society6 account so you can purchase it in different colours and sizes.
I'm actually in the middle of designing a whole set of Blogger greeting cards. I've got loads of ideas.
I'm smiling here because minutes before I narrowly escaped being attacked by a squirrel coming over that fence. We have LOTS of squirrels here and they aren't afraid of me anything.
Case in point, one evening I was home alone and had just finished eating supper. I was washing the dishes and heard a light tap, tap, tap. We have a large glass patio door that leads out of the kitchen onto a deck into the backyard. I glanced over at the patio doors, no one was there.
Then I heard it again.
Tap, tap, tap...
I went to check the front door.
No one was there either.
I came back and started doing the dishes again.
Tap, tap, tap...
The hairs on the back of my neck started to bristle.
It was dark.
I was alone.
Tap, tap, tap...
My mind started to race...
...was it a pack of zombies tapping on the windows in the basement?
Who was going to save me?
Tap, tap, tap...
I was starting to seriously lose my shit.
Whomever, whatever it was, they weren't giving up.
Tap, tap, tap...
This time I was sure it was coming from the patio doors.
Then I saw it.
There, in the very lower corner of the glass door, hidden in shadows I spotted a black wirey looking squirrel with beady dark eyes and a manic tail sitting next to the window. He brought up his little fist and knocked again on the window.
Tap, tap, tap.
He wanted in!
What did he need? To borrow a cup of sugar?
His tail was wildly gesticulating and he seemed agitated. Like he was hopped up on Red Bull and Ritalin.
Why was he knocking on my patio door? Why hadn't he gone to the neighbours?
Then I started to think that maybe he was some psycho squirrel that required an invitation into the house like a vampire. Then, once inside, he would carry out his master plan for world domination. He would destroy my house and enslave me to an eternity of piling acorns in different corners of the house.
My mind may have gone a bit squirrely rogue on me at that point and I was starting to scare myself. Like at the point in the horror movie when the person screams into the phone...
"It's coming from inside the house!!!"
That squirrel was seriously beginning to
I didn't care if he could knock better than any well trained Jehova's Witness...that high strung acorn junkie rodent was not getting in my house.
He knocked again.
He stared at me,
challenging me with those black beady eyes.
His tail twitched.
He looked a bit desperate, like he really needed to use the bathroom.
My resolved started to soften a bit.
I waved at him.
He waved his tail frantically.
And then he beat his little fist on the window again.
"Ah helloooooo lady! Can't you see me here? Let me in!"
His eyes didn't leave mine.
I stared back, surprised that the waving of my hand hadn't scared him away.
We just looked at each other.
It was a stare stand off.
Would would give in first?
He seemed pretty stubborn crazy.
I looked at him.
I was determined to hold my ground.
I gave him my best, "Go ahead, make my day... squirrel" look.
He stared back at me with his best, "Avon calling!" look.
No one moved.
We just stared.
Finally Zoë came around the corner wondering what all the fuss was about. Once the little freak saw Zoë he took off straight away. That squirrel was no dummy...he realized I'd already been enslaved by a pug years ago.
Cross my heart...every word of this story is true, I had to call my parents to tell them just how weird it all was.
Hardly any martinis were consumed prior to the whole event.
My sister flew across the country to visit me in September and while she was here we did the normal lady-like things you'd expect...shopping, eating, drinking, shopping, repeat.
The reason I'm not drinking my usual martini is because we were at a Thai restaurant and I needed to try one of their specialty drinks.
The water pitcher on the table with the yellow top sings like a tropical bird when you pour water out of it.
Yeah I'm wearing patterned jeans to hike. It's a blogger thing.
We were out having lunch and shopping and I didn't bring other pants to change into when we got to the park. As it was we had to change in the car and there was a guy parked next to us the whole time. #bloggeroverexposed.
We also went to see this...
It was a very wild & funny ride my friends...it goes beyond where you think they will go. Just so you know, the writers were the same people that wrote South Park. And they go ALL THE WAY and then some.
We loved it.
The wild and crazy was only just starting though...as we decided to become "Weekend Warriors" zip lining, suspension bridge tree canopy touring, rappelling and kayaking.
I've been zip lining before in Costa Rica and loved it...so another go around this time with my sister was a blast.
And yes...I'm a tree hugger...
This was my sister saying goodbye at the 40 ft rappel. I must admit this part had me scared. You have to manoeuvre around at the edge of the platform and then dangle over. Believe it or not...I have a fear of heights. I put on my big lady panties that day and got through it though.
The gal in front of us made it worse because she was super scared. It took her at least 10 minutes to get the courage to go down.
How do you like the outfit? Now this is how to layer ladies! I mean how many times can you wear a baseball cap and a helmet on a fashion blog?
The gloves are a bit gauche though don't you think?
And the harness is doing nothing at all for my crotch whiskers. It does act as a very good external bra though.
Yeah...that little red helmet zipping away into the unknown is me : )
It may not look like it, but this suspension bridge was the scariest for me. You can't tell from the photo...but you are high up...super high up. Our wonderful guide got 4 of us out there at once and proceeded to have all of us lean with all our body weight on one side of the bridge...faces down...stomach flat on the cables. We were laying down, horizontally staring at the vast valley below.
At this point I may have screamed.
More than once.
The whole bridge was tipped. It felt like it was going to flip around on us any second.
This really got the adrenalin pumping.
I felt a bit like Wonder Woman after that.
The next day we had a bit of a more tranquil setting...kayaking down Big Creek.
The biggest deal on the kayak trip was the bathroom...which, as you may have guessed is in the same place where all the other animals in nature do it...in the bush, with one major exception...there was an actual toilet seat. Someone took four planks of wood and stuck a toilet seat on top. There wasn't even really a hole. You still had to squat all the way down, almost to the ground, but at least you were sitting on a toilet seat! LOL It was weird. I don't know how that makes it environmentally friendly. Who am I to judge though...I'm no survivor woman. One of the other gals on the trip did bring a roll of toilet paper with her...clearly her survival skills are far superior to my own.
I had never been to Long Point and I can tell you that the beach was vast and the sand was very soft. It went as far as we could see in both directions. It reminded me of the eastern Florida coast, but it's not the ocean...it's Lake Erie.
Finally I wanted to share one of the wonderful jazz singers from the South Coast Jazz festival. This is June Garber. I was as impressed with her outfit/nails/lashes/hair as I was with her singing. This woman doesn't let her age dictate a thing.
I apologize in advance if the camera is a tiny bit wobbly. I had several glasses of wine by that time.
The venue was inside the Burning Kiln winery and you can see some of the vats when I zoom out to the people dancing.
I think every weekend warrior event needs to end with a few glasses of wine and some good music.
I really like to "rough" it.
Have you tried any adventure sports? What was the scariest/most fun? I might need to add something to my bucket list.
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